If you can and have the means, I highly recommend donating to Family Meal, a Portland-based nonprofit designed to help food service and agricultural workers during a medical debt crisis. Your help right now is needed more than ever. Thank you.
“2020 was a year where everything we knew was taken right from out under us. Sure, you’ve been hearing this all year as we’ve been going through it for the last eight months now… but I think this holiday as we’re either alone or with immediate roommates/family, celebrating as closely as we have previously or just absent of the seasonal spirit all together… at least we can take a second to try to find some appreciation for the good things some big (mostly small) that we can look back on to at least try to end on a happy-ish note.“
… Was how I was originally going to start this blog, but to be honest, after writing an almost complete blog post, it felt disingenuous. Because as much as I like to talk about appreciation, being happy, making the most of the good things already in our lives… I’m pretty depressed. I don’t think I’ve admitted that to myself, but here I am… announcing it to the internet.
It’s currently winter break, and I’m sitting at my parents’ home in near darkness, because I’m too lazy to turn on more lights, and as much as I would like to drone on and on about how unmotivated, overwhelmed, stressed and anxious about all the things I should be doing right now and prepping for… I can’t. So I’ve thrown out my previous fake-happy draft, and this is now an active exercise that you, fellow reader, can follow along with if you have also been feeling as gloomy and frozen in existential dread as I have been.
So I’d like to pose these questions to you, as food for thought:
When was the last time you expressed appreciation for something or someone?
I think someone would appreciate you saying that to them. If you have, find someone else to say it to.
What’s three good things that happened to you in the last week?
Big or small, little victories are the things that make the regular rundowns easier, y’know?
For me, it’d be getting myself to exercise everyday for the last week, being able to eat dinner with my grandma and writing this blog.
Did you do some self-care or at least something healthy for yourself in the last hour?
No, not face masks and junk food – I’m talking about the hard stuff that you know would be beneficial to be doing now to help future you! Like, getting a small errand done or similarly that you’ve avoided. Like I just went to get the mail.
Or, something like, did you eat something healthy today? Did you drink enough water today? Rest your eyes from a screen? (Rest your eyes after reading this blog post, please!)
Have you taken a moment to just… breathe?
Ironic coming from me, but I think as I take more time to just… not do stuff (to my benefit and detriment) I’ve realized I’m like a tightly wound spring about to burst. Maybe you’re like me, or maybe you’re not, but do take a moment to just take in the moment. With 2020 finishing up, I think you should take a moment to pat yourself on the back for surviving the chaos – even if chaos is just getting through today.
Lastly: someone appreciates you and hopes you’re doing okay – that’s me, plus a lot of other people in your circles.
It’s the holidays, so it’s totally acceptable to reach out and check in on people. If you’re concerned about being lonely, just reach out. We’re all lonely, so it’s okay to make the first step. But at the same time, you have to let people in if you want to feel better as well.
That’s it from me. I hope this exercise was somewhat helpful. I’ve gotta go back to doing more stuff for school, and then… sleep. I wish this was more upbeat. I wish I was baking and being merry, but I just can’t for this week. Maybe with Christmas being the end of the week I’ll do something, but for now…
I hope you’re doing well and staying safe.
Have you eaten yet? If not, don’t forget to!
Em
Originally published on sikfanmei.home.blog on December 22, 2020.
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